When the day just refuses to be OK

One day you wake up in the morning and bam you are struck with bad mood. You don't know what gave that mood in your sleep and it starts bugging you. Now, whatever you do will be a great pain to you (every part of your body) and mind you everything just turns against you as well. Happens with me a lot and dude I really can't smile then, it hurts, and the frequency of happening can go up from 2 to 7 days a week. Some of you might be smiling by now, because I know I'm not the only one. The thing with a bad mood in the morning can be actually related to what you thought before going to sleep, OK don't start thinking. The problem mostly would be over-thinking and your sleep is disturbed which gives those grumpy mornings. Its like a backlog from yesterday and you don't know the reason mostly. Today turns out  one of those days for me, I just feel like putting it down because I want to, it would be good for the ones who read.

I start my day waking up with a day which seemed just fine, except for I had sprain from Friday on my palm just below my index finger (this can happen only to me). The doctor also looked at me twice because he couldn't laugh, me being his patient. I actually thought I might have dislocated my bone the swelling as hard as a bone but was kind of relieved that it is a sprain only. Tried making some tea and touched the hot vessel, addition of some more pain to the one I already have, I just decided to look up and asked what more. He decides 'Ohhhh you want more, let's go for it', yeah and I get more. I take out my car and start driving to work, 5 min later, dude horn not blowing, driving during office hours in Mumbai traffic can be a torture I cannot even dream of. The hands went to the horn again and again but alas no use and you have to give way to every idiot on the road who thinks if you don't honk they have their way. They did have and the 5 km drive through the busy roads of Andheri was the slowest and never ending, because some pedestrians are strolling on the road because they don't have parks in Mumbai.

Just managed to reach work and I find people occupying my place, OK no I won't crib. I do get my place in an hour, just starting my day I get company. People will think that's good, but the company I have refuses to talk to me, not exactly refused but they start talking to each other in Marathi loudly. Why? Why? Why? They don't want to include me it's OK but why torturing me, over that if you are on a call and they don't decide to lower their volumes as well, huh. Yes it is torture, you really don't know what to do in such a situation (I don't know yet). Yes and the AC has been set at 16C because people feel so hot that they don't care if you freeze to death. Still half day left and don't know what else is in store for me....I wrote this before I die!!! 

When your Boss is Insecure

When your boss is insecure you will have an experience of a lifetime. All you do is never good enough and you will forget what it is to feel good (personal experience... boss). So, this boss of yours is the one who will call you at 5 pm on a Friday and ask you to finish some task, no deadlines mind you. Saturday evening call says why there is no mail, okay actually call is better it can just be a mail which you might not check for hours, all technology fails here. Mind you more reminders awaited till 12 on Saturday night. You finally check your mailbox to see 10 reminders for a task which had no deadline and you will just think, you still cannot get an answer, why there are no calls or WhatsApp message or SMS for anything so important. Trust me this is not it, there is more to come. You will not know what, how & why you will do something or not do it, because you can't ask him he is always busy and nobody knows what you are doing at office.

Coming to daily schedule if you are in this position, travelling in the heat and sweat to your office only to realise not much has to be done today. You feel Oh Great! I will just spend time doing something on my own, maybe watch some YouTube videos, the time refuses to pass and even the most interesting things look mundane. Then you wait for lunch, and the tea breaks which gives you some movement time, most importantly human contact. OK still there are 4 more hours to go, you call your boss to know what's happening and how you can be a part of the project which is going on, he is busy as usual and your call is not answered. Call your teammate or if you are lucky someone around you might be the right person to talk to, they kind of ignore you because they don't want to offend 'The Boss'. Hmmm... now what to do. You should never leave hope, try mails and motivational messages on WhatsApp, try connect. Maybe you forgot this might seem like taking over the boss's position and yes even if he doesn't feel so there is always a Narad Muni who will let him know, so you are screwed even more. So you are stuck in the vicious circle (worse than Abhimanyu's Chakravyuh). 

What to do now???? GET A NEW JOB (it was a simple one)

It is said you should choose your boss and not the job, not easy or possible. Honestly if he or she is truly capable they are not boss anymore, they are managers or better leaders. The choice of people for most jobs is either on educational qualification or worse just sucking up. There is hardly any grooming or training to become a team leader, and when you turn out to be a threat to such people because their capabilities are limited, they just are insecure and what happens is history. Okay changing jobs everyday is just not possible or telling someone the reason of an insecure boss makes you look like a vamp (the nation has become very intolerant... He he he). So, before you decide to join a job try meet the reporting manager have a chat, the vibes from him or her will give you the comfort of making a decision, honestly if they are not good managers you can make it out (I can tell you what to look for... but that would be private sessions on chargeable basis :P).

PS: All views are personal and might not hold true for all

Mumbai- The City That Never Sleeps

Mumbai, the city that never sleeps... I fell in love with it when I first came here. Many people have asked me the reason and I have no answers. First time to Mumbai was 2007, I was a kid first time away from home and maybe the freedom or rather say the feeling of growing up had taken over me. I was a visitor then and years after that day I had traveled to Mumbai as a visitor, I enjoyed it. And somewhere always wanted to live in Mumbai.

September 2015 I finally came to Mumbai with a suitcase mostly like the Hindi films, only thing I was not here to be an actress. But yes I was here... I had felt a mixed flow of emotions after coming to this city to finally become a part of it. I can't explain a word of what I had felt and why so, this was not my first time away from home, but it was different. The days started with house-hunting, ideally I didn't do it but had outsourced it to my brother. It was only a tear which didn't roll my cheek looking at the house that day. But I decided to stay there, Andheri it was, the only place I knew in Mumbai or Bombay as I still fondly call it that. The next ordeal which awaited me was the local train and I started hating it. I thought myself to be a fool to like a place which had small houses, crowded trains and the never ending traffic. But I knew nothing would have changed in the coming time and I have to live with it.

Time has passed by, not even a year and I didn't realize when I became a part of it. I am a part of Mumbai the city I love so much. It gave me and more than taught me a lot. I know why I like the city so much. The beauty of this city is that it welcomes you with open hands, everyone becomes a part of it. Because no one cares who came and who went, the city runs, it is always running. The people around me are running and I know that they don't know why they are running. They are fighting an unsaid battle everyday, the traffic, the train and so many more things and still they smile. They let you be the way you are they don't ask you to change, they don't have time to tell you anything. They are busy fighting for themselves, the unsaid battles. I don't know who wins it or who has ever won it, but we all fight. Maybe Mumbai wins, its heart wins.

I am like everyone here or rather they are like me.

Raining Memories

She was staring out of the window with her favorite doll in her hand. It was raining heavily outside, the monsoon was here. People on the streets tried to keep their umbrellas but the wind wouldn't let them. Pia smiled to herself if only she could have drenched herself in the rain. She loved the rains and the scent of the earth when the rain first hit it. She looked at her Apple smart watch and realized all her time was trapped in this 8 by 8 cabin.

Pia was always a bright student as a kid and her parents were proud of her. She was determined to become a famous personality one day and here she was heading holding the most prestigious position in one of the finest companies in the world. Her cabin gave the most spectacular view of the most beautiful part of Mumbai, the Marine Drive or rightly said "The Necklace Road". The day they announced her the CEO of the company she couldn't believe her ears, she was so happy that she wanted to call but there was no one to call. Her parents had died in the car crash six years ago & the only person who she wanted to talk to didn't want to talk to her. Avinash & Pia had known each other for three years and they got married eleven years back. Everyone was very happy that day, they were the made for each other couple. The happiest was Toby their 2 years old dog who finally knew that Pia will always be there in the house to give him food. Their life was like a perfect picture, a happy couple with their Toby who wouldn't leave a single pillow in place. 

It all felt yesterday to Pia, everything was fresh in her memories the day Avinash was on his knees proposing to her to the day he left. She didn't know what had changed in all these years when & why they had drifted apart. The day she became the CEO she went to the house where she had grown up and looked for her favorite doll, she thought to herself that she wouldn't leave her, Toby was also not there any more he suffered a  kidney failure three months back. She stood there gazing at the sea which was not calm and quiet anymore, she could feel it even in the darkness. She saw her reflection in the glass and saw a wrinkle running on the corner of her eye, age had started catching up she thought. She was 39, successful and alone, her achievements in life. She woke up alone in the morning, went for a run, come home to cooked breakfast which she mostly never ate and rushed to office for those endless meetings and calls and came back home, no an empty house. She had earned well a Mercedes to drive alone, a big kitchen in an empty big bungalow which was hardly used and those endless gadgets which reminded her that she had nothing else to do.

The guard asked "Madam 10 baj gaye aap ghar nahi jayengi", she looked at him & smiled gesturing that she was leaving. She picked up the keys of her luxurious car to drive to her empty waiting huge bungalow.